On your marks...

Tomorrow is the first day of October, which means that the fall race season is about to kick into high gear. This Sunday, I'll be running the Annapolis Striders' Metric Marathon (about 16.6 miles), which will be my longest race to date and my longest before the marathon. In two weeks, Val and I (along with many other running buddies) are doing the Baltimore Half-Marathon. I remember watching that on the treadmill last year and thinking "I wonder if I could do that one day." If you had told me then that this year's race would actually be my fourth half-marathon, I would not have believed you! Then, I think we all know what's happening on October 31st (gulp). After that, I have a few short races in November and then my (hopefully) triumphant return to the Striders' Anniversary 15K in December. I did that one last year and it wasn't pretty, but I'll save that story for later.

A few updates:

Earlier this week, I got the above photo in the mail. This is me headed for the finish of the Parks Half-Marathon, 16 days after my surgery. I've never paid for one of these professional race photos before because they are crazy expensive, but I thought this was a memory worth preserving. I think I will put it in a frame with an engraved plaque that says "walk it off."

After I wrote about my awful run last Saturday, I got word from many other running buddies that Saturday was an awful day for them too. Funny how these things can be contagious. The one person for whom it was not a bad day was Val, who placed first in her age group at a 10K! Amazing! Its incredible how much Val has improved since I met her in January, and I know how hard she worked to get where she is now. Inspirational.

Today, I awoke to find that monsoon season has arrived in Annapolis. My alarm went off at 5:30am and I should have gone to boot camp, but it was cold, dark, and pouring. The last thing I wanted to do was go outside, even just to go to my car. So, I turned off the alarm and the next thing I knew it was 8:15am, aka: the exact time that I am supposed to leave for work. D'oh! The moral of this story: don't skip boot camp!

Finally, the current combined donation total is $1670. We have progressed a lot in the past couple of weeks, but we have a long way to go to hit $5000. If you haven't donated yet, please do it now!

Kid triathletes? Awesome. Me? Not so much.

In my experience, there are a few kinds of runs: You have the good and great runs, where you feel amazing and finish feeling like you could keep on going. You have the okay runs, where you make it, but you are definitely ready for it to be over a little while before you finish. You have the pretty bad runs, where you struggle, but you feel great about yourself once you push through. And, finally, you have the truly bad runs, where you can't hack it at all and you finish feeling a little (or a lot) demoralized.

This morning was a truly bad run. By 3 miles in, I felt terrible and it just never got any better. I had intended to do 18-20, but very quickly decided to scale it back to 16, and I probably walked close to 40% of that. I'm really not sure what made it so bad. In part, it was the heat and humidity, which spiked again after several weeks of cooler weather. I've also had a hard time getting back to regular aerobic workouts since my appendix incident and the return to classes. While my strength is back, I'm definitely feeling a decline in my cardio fitness. Finally, I think my newish shoes might not be working so well for me and I may need to consider a switch before the marathon. Despite my extraordinarily tight budget, I just booked myself an hour-long sports massage for tomorrow. Hopefully, that will help exorcise this crappy run and put me in a good place to start the new week on Monday. 

The one bright spot this morning was that, for part of our run, we shared the trail with the bike and run portions of a kids' triathlon. From what I could tell, there were three age groups: under 8, 9-11, and 12 and up. These kids were awesome. They were trying so hard and looked like they were having a great time. I made a point of cheering for every kid that passed me. While a few of them seemed to wonder why a random adult was yelling at them, most of them grinned from ear to ear. After I reached my turnaround, I ran back and saw them all gathered at the finish with their parents and their medals, telling their war stories and looking so proud of themselves. 

I hate to end this on a negative note, but I have to comment on the behavior of some of the other adults on the trail. While most were supportive of the kids, and many clapped and cheered, I definitely saw a few grumbling about sharing the trail. At one point, I even saw two adult bikers refuse to slow down and almost clip a couple of the kids. Seriously? This is Saturday training on the B&A trail; its neither the Boston Marathon nor the Tour de France. Get over yourselves and support kids that are pushing themselves and doing something positive. As Jillian, Katie, and I would say: walk it off!    

Walk it off, part 2.

As I mentioned in the last post, the new season of "The Biggest Loser" started on Tuesday. While there are some legitimate complaints about this show (setting up unrealistic expectations, making everything about the number on the scale, etc.), I have always appreciated it for the way that it explores the deeper issues that cause people to lose control of their lives and their bodies. On the premiere, the host and trainers travelled around the country narrowing a group of semi-finalists into the final group of contestants for the season. Each semi-finalist got a brief intro profile, and most of them talked about experiences of grief and trauma. Abusive/addicted parents, sibling loss, loss of a child, and abusive relationships all came up more than once.

As a society, I think we're making progress in how we talk about grief and trauma. Compared to our parents, my siblings and I were taught to be a little more open about difficult feelings, and my nieces and nephews are being taught to be much more open. Still, I can't tell you how often I do a family history with a client and uncover multiple losses and traumas which they have never really talked about with anyone. As the contestants on "The Biggest Loser" demonstrate, human beings can not just walk away from these experiences unscathed. We need to talk about them and work through them, and we usually need help from someone we trust in order to do it.

Which brings me to a quote that Katie C. shared on her own blog today, from the always-wise Mr. Rogers:"Anything that’s human is mentionable, and anything that is mentionable can be more manageable. When we can talk about our feelings, they become less overwhelming, less upsetting, and less scary. The people we trust with that important talk can help us know that we are not alone." I feel very lucky to be that trusted person for so many people, and very grateful for those who have been that person to me!
  

Walk it off.



"The Biggest Loser" started its new season on Tuesday, but Katie C. and I have been channeling trainer Jillian for a few weeks now. Over the summer, we realized that we would be in the same section of Psychological Testing this semester. This is the second of two statistics-based courses in the Loyola MS program (PhD students do more), and a source of great anxiety for many. As a (very) general rule, people drawn to human services professions like counseling are not the most mathematically-minded people, and many have not taken a math course in years. Thus, the stats classes tend to be the sites of numerous student freakouts and meltdowns, which consume valuable instructional time.

Inspired by the summer fill-in show "Losing It With Jillian," Katie and I decided that we could improve the stats experience by tapping into our own inner Jillians. So, when a student starts to freak out, we could stand over his or her shoulder and shout things like "Walk it off!," "Be in it to win it!," and "Don't say 'can't' to me!" When the whole class starts to lose it, we could lead them in some quick jumping jacks or push-ups to blow off steam. The prof hasn't called on us for this important job yet, but I find myself thinking these things whenever I'm confused, stuck, bored or annoyed in class. I can tell Katie is doing it too, because I sometimes see her chuckling to herself during the tougher moments in class. So thanks, Jillian. This problem set's for you.

On a totally unrelated note, I had one of my new favorite dinners last night: spaghetti with bacon and eggs. This is slightly adapted from a Real Simple recipe (available at http://www.realsimple.com/) and it is great for both pre-run carb loading and post-run recovery. Just watch your portions and don't eat it every night if you're trying to maintain or lose weight. I don't think its Bob-and-Jillian approved.

Ingredients

1 box whole-wheat spaghetti (For me, this is enough for 4-6 servings. If I'm cooking for just myself, I make the whole box and save the leftovers for later in the week.)

About 1/4 cup canola or olive oil, and 1/2-3/4 cup grated Parmesan (This is enough for the whole box of pasta. Again, I make it all and save it.)

2 slices turkey bacon per serving

2 eggs per serving

kosher salt and black pepper

Directions

1.Cook pasta according to the package directions. Drain and return pasta to the pot.

2. Toss pasta with the oil, the Parmesan, and salt and pepper to taste.

3. Cook bacon in a nonstick or cast-iron skillet over medium heat until crisp. Transfer to a paper towel-lined plate. 

4.Wipe out the skillet and return it to medium heat. Crack eggs into it and cook until whites are set but yolks are still runny.

5. Divide pasta among bowls, toss each serving with 2 strips of crumbled bacon, and and top each serving with 2 eggs.

Super-easy and delicious! The best part is, if you only cook for 1 or 2, you wind up with enough leftover spaghetti to make this at least a couple more times (and believe me, you will want to). Enjoy!

A grand day!

Thanks to the generosity of many of you, my fundraising numbers just surpassed $1000! Yay! As of today, Katie and I have a combined total of $1535, and we need $3465 to reach our goal. Thanks, and keep it coming!

Other people's emergencies.

For the past few weeks, it seems like my life has been about running and emergencies. In a slight change of pace, this morning it was other people's emergencies rather than my own:

I met Val at 6am for what was supposed to be a 20-mile run (my first, her second). When we set out, I knew I wanted to attempt the 20-miler, but I wasn't sure I would be able to do it after all my time off. I did pretty well for the first half. By mile 11 or 12, I was having hip and back pain and had to slow down. I made a lot of stretching stops and took some walk breaks. By mile 15, the walk breaks were longer and more frequent. At this point, Val had to go on ahead in order to make it to her grandkids' sports events, so I was on my own for a bit.

Then, at mile 17 1/2, I came up on our last water stop, and saw Val there along with another Striders marathoner and two coaches from a Team in Training group. It turned out that our fellow marathon trainee was having severe leg pain and lightheadedness. Val, always the caretaker, agreed to walk with her back to the cars and of course I agreed to come along. So, we walked with our new friend for about 2 miles, until our coaches (who had heard what happened) drove up and gave our friend a ride. Then, Val and I ran to the finish. So, in the end, it was a 20 mile run/walk, but I think that was probably what I needed to do today anyway.

When I got to my car, I had a message from my mother. It was about my 16 year-old niece, Summer, pictured with me here:



 Ever since Summer was little, I've said that she's the new (and improved) me. She's smart, loves school, is easy-going, has a great sense of humor and a short attention span, likes President Obama, and spent some time as a vegetarian. When my mom called, it sounded like she had taken after me in another way: appendicitis! She had gone to urgent care that morning with severe abdominal pain and nausea and been taken by ambulance to the very same hospital where I was 3 weeks ago. When she got there, she underwent all of the same tests that I had. My mom and I got there a few hours after she arrived and I had the strange experience of re-living part of my hospital stay from a visitor's point of view. Fortunately, it turned out that Summer does not have appendicitis and she should be fully recovered from her illness in a few days. We were all very relieved!

Once Summer was discharged, I went home for a long-awaited nap followed by a big dinner. A peaceful, pleasant end to an eventful day!

Some other important numbers.

A few minutes ago, I wrote about my race number, 20398. Here are a few more important numbers:

7- On Sunday, that will be the number of weeks left until the race.

$1295.00- That's how much Katie and I have raised, combined, to date for the Kelly Murray Scholarship Fund at Loyola.

$5000.00- That's how much Katie and I would like to raise by the marathon on Oct. 31.

$3705.00- That's how much more we need to raise to reach our goal. 

If you have been meaning to donate, but haven't done it yet, there's no time like the present! All you have to do is visit http://www.active.com/donate/marathonformurray (my site) or http://www.active.com/donate/marathonformurray2 (Katie's site). If you would prefer to mail a check, email me and I'll tell you how (aliciakimbrooks@gmail.com).

You can also help by telling friends and family about this fundraiser, especially people connected to Dr. Murray and/or Loyola.

I haven't even run the race yet, and this marathon has already changed my life in many ways. Please help Katie and I use this experience to change the lives of some deserving students as well!

20398

That's the bib number I just downloaded from the MCM website. It will be my number on race day. I hope its a lucky one!

I'm in the middle of a pretty crazy week right now. I'm about to enter my busiest time of the year at work, school just started up again, and I'm gradually resuming the training schedule I was on before my surgery. My life is basically gym, work, school, eat, sleep, repeat. I do have a couple updates worth noting:

At this point, I feel pretty much healed. I don't have any pain in my incision sites any more. I am having some shortness of breath, but I think that's more about having missed 2 1/2 weeks than about the surgery. I'm back to my regular weights in Group Power and I even added a bit this week. I went back to boot camp this morning, which was super-hard, but again, I think that was more about the training break. My training group is doing 20 miles this Saturday, and I'm going to get as close to that as possible. Our schedule for the next four Saturdays is 20, 18, 20, 18. I may have to do 18, 20, 20, 18, but I think that's okay.

On Tuesday, I finally got around to uploading the Nike+ data from my race on Sunday, and I was a little surprised. As you may recall, I forgot my watch, so I had no way to gauge how fast I was going throughout the race. I felt like I went slow for miles 1-6, much faster for 7-10, and then slowest for 11-13. According to the Nike+, I ran a pretty consistent pace throughout. Miles 7-10 were about 10 seconds/mile faster than 1-6 and 11-13, which were all about the same. I suppose that this says good things about my ability to stick to a pace, even if my ability to gauge that pace myself is a little weak.  

This may be a good time to say how I feel about the Nike+ system, which I've been using since 2007. Nike+ involves a sensor that you put in your Nike+ shoe (or on the laces of your non-Nike shoe, using an unlicensed adapter). The sensor connects wirelessly to a receiver which is pre-installed in IPod Touch or IPhone. If you don't have an IPod Touch or IPhone (I don't), you can buy a receiver for an IPod Nano or one that comes in a wristwatch. I have both of the latter options. However you set it up, the functions of the Nike+ system are very basic: it tracks time, distance, pace, and calories. If you use it with an IPod, you can choose to have a voice update your progress throughout your run and you can download special workouts and playlists from ITunes. When you upload it, all of your data gets sent to a website, where you can look at graphs and stats from your runs and do some social networking. If you want, you can connect to sites like Facebook, Twitter, and DailyMile (that's how I get the ticker updating my mileage on this blog).

For me, the biggest selling point of Nike+ is the price tag. If you go with the wristband option, it will only cost you $59 plus the cost of the shoes. Even if you have to buy an Ipod and shoes, you'll spend less than you would for some of the mid-priced Garmin models. This is important for people like me who have a tendency to break small electronic gadgets (I'm on Nano #4 and wristband #2). The biggest drawbacks are the limited functions and the accuracy. Nike and IPod claim that the system will be perfectly calibrated for 95% of runners straight out of the box. I do not find that to be true at all. I have calibrated and re-calibrated numerous times and its still not always accurate. If you're just looking for basic data and don't mind a margin of error, Nike+ is probably a good fit for you.   

Okay, back to work and then off to class!

Take that, appendix!: the 2010 Parks Half Marathon

Last November, I ran my first race longer than a 5K. It was the 2009 Turkey Burnoff 5-miler, put on by Montgomery County Road Runners and held in Seneca Creek State Park. It was a great race in a beautiful park. During the race, I noticed hundreds of people wearing "2009 Parks Half Marathon" t-shirts. I deduced that this was another fall MCRR race, held in another beautiful park. I thought "Its too bad I don't run half-marathons because that's probably a fun race."

Little did I know that, just a couple months later, I would be training for my first half-marathon. Or that, just a few weeks after that, I would be crazy enough to sign up for a full marathon. I never would have guessed that the 2010 Parks Half Marathon would actually be my third half marathon. Funny how these things happen.

As late as this past Thursday, I didn't think I would be running at all. As I mentioned in previous posts, I've been mostly recovered from my appendectomy for about a week now, but I was still having pain at my incision sites when I tried to run. I really didn't want to bail on another race so soon after missing the A10. For the past week or so, I've been icing, taking Advil, eating tons of protein and carbs, resting, putting myself on prayer lists- anything I could think of. Something worked, because I went out for a test run yesterday, and had no pain at all. Game on!

I had to leave my house at 4:30 this morning in order to get parking and hit the last-minute packet pickup for this race. When I left, it was chilly and sheeting rain. Fortunately, by the time the race started, it had warmed up a bit and the rain had become a mere drizzle. The race started at the Rockville Metro station. At mile 2, we turned into Rock Creek park, which we ran all the way to Bethesda. The Rock Creek trail is narrow, so the race start was staggered by pace group. I put myself in the 11:15-12:00 group and stuck with them for the first 6 miles. Thanks to this slightly-slower-than-usual pace, I hit mile 6 feeling great, and decided to push it a little.

I really hit my stride for miles 6-9 and made my way to the back of the next group up. I passed a ton of people who had gone out too fast. Around mile 10, I started feeling like one of those people. I had to back off a bit for miles 10-12, but I managed to stay with my new group. Most of us picked it up in mile 13, especially when we passed a wonderful volunteer who let us know we were only 1/4 mile from the finish. I had inadvertantly left my watch at home, so I had no idea of my time as I approached the finish. I thought I might be on track to beat my best half time, 2:24, but wound up finishing at 2:35. I think I took it too easy in the beginning and too hard in the middle. Oh well. The park was beautiful and I felt 1,000 times better than I did during that half in July (shudder).

After the race, I met up with my friend Scott, who ignored my odor and took me out for a burger and a beer. The burger was some kind of CA inspired creation with avacado and sprouts. It would have been good under any circumstances, but after a long run it was unbelivable. As we ate, I thought about the fact that, just two weeks ago, I was stuck on my couch eating canned soup and icing my belly. Hooray for healing!

On the road again!

I like to think Willie Nelson and I have many things in common. For example, when we're not on the road, we can't wait to get back on it again. As of this morning, it had been three weeks since I did a long run. I had tried to run a few times since my surgery, but always had to stop because of pain at the site of one of my incisions. After two weeks of diligent icing and Advil-popping, I decided to give it another go this morning. Lo and behold, the pain was gone! I did 7 miles, which wasn't easy after all that time off, but gave me the confidence to attempt my scheduled race tomorrow. I'll let you know how that goes.

Another thing Willie and I have in common is that we both love this country, and we're especially fond of values like personal (including religious) freedom and tolerance. I hope we can all keep those values in mind today.

Good news and bad news.

This has been a week of good news and bad news. Good news: I'm back at work. Bad news: I am totally swamped from all my time off. Stuff like that. Here are some highlights:

Good news: I had a follow-up with my surgeon and I have been pronounced officially healed. The doctor is totally satisfied with my progress and says that I have "no restrictions" on what I can do. I've been able to return to Group Power and some other athletic activities. Bad news: I haven't been able to run yet. Even though I'm healing well, the sites of my incisions are still a bit swollen and tender, and the pounding of running causes significant pain. Its getting a little less every day, though, and I'm hoping I'll be able to get in a longish run this weekend. We'll see.

Good news: Over the weekend, I ran into a colleague from my first pseudo-counseling job, which I held from 2002-2004. I hadn't seen her in 3 or 4 years, and it was great to hear her news and also get caught up on events in the community where I used to work. Bad news: My former colleague informed me of the death of one of my most beloved former clients. She was a grandmother, raising her grandchildren after one of their parents died and the other was incarcerated. She was one of the strongest and most loving people I've ever known. I told her at our very first meeting that I was there to work for her, and she was humble enough to let me do that, despite being many years older than me and light years more experienced in life. At the same time, she found hundreds of little ways to let me know that she cared for me, as a professional and as a person. I've thought about her and her family thousands of times in the 6+ years since I last saw them, and the world feels just a little colder knowing that she's gone from it.

Finally, a piece of unambiguous good news: I saw a former clinical supervisor on Wednesday who knows about my marathon plans and about the appendix situation. I was updating her on my progress, and she commented that she had talked to her brother (a marathoner) about my situation and shared some of his advice. I was so unbelievably touched that this person had thought enough about my situation to actually talk about it with her family. It made me think about all of the people, throughout all the various nooks and crannies of my life, who are so invested in my marathon experience. I don't have adequate words to express how touched I am that so many people care so deeply about me and my journey. I truly feel like I will be running this marathon with a support team of hundreds. I can not thank all of you enough!

"It worries me."

If you've ever seen "Project Runway" (and if you haven't, you should), you've probably seen Tim Gunn say "it worries me" while making the face pictured above. 

I thought of this picture yesterday when I went out and attempted to run for the first time since my surgery. The good news is that my breath issues were not a problem. Owing in part to the dramatically cooler weather, I was able to walk briskly for a good 45 minutes. The trouble came when I tried to pick it up to a run. As soon as I did that, the pounding made my surgery incisions flare up painfully. I felt like I was getting hundreds of little punches in the gut. Not good. I didn't push it, because I know that will only make things worse. I think I'm just going to have to wait until things heal up a bit. Unfortunately, I am not a quick healer when it comes to things like cuts and bruises. I used to think it was anemia from all my years as a vegetarian, but the added iron I'm getting from eating red meat doesn't seem to be helping much. So, I'm worried. Next week's half-marathon is looking more and more like next week's $55 I can't get back. Boo.

As long as I can't spend two hours at the gym every day, I'm continuing to channel that energy into developing my beginner sewing skills. I've been working on sewing since mid-2008, when I started watching "Project Runway" and grew envious of the contestants who can make amazing things from scratch. I had an old sewing machine in my attic, something a former roommate purchased at a yard sale for $10 and never used. I pulled it out, ordered some simple sewing books, and spent a good couple weeks figuring out the machine's manufacture date and model number and then hunting down an old manual online. Just learning how the machine works and getting aquainted with the basic tools of sewing took a couple of months. Several times, I've been tempted to just fork over $200 for a newer machine, which would probably be infinitely simpler and easier to use. For some reason, though, I feel a strange loyalty to my early 70's avacado green Kenmore (see previous post for a photo). 

In the past two years, I haven't had the time I would need to devote to sewing to get good (or even competent) at it. Whenever I have blocks of free time though (holidays, blizzards, post-surgery recovery), I try to complete a simple project or two. Little by little, I'm starting to feel like I'm not totally lost, and that feels pretty good.

While I sew, I like to put on old seasons of "Project Runway" for inspiration. Its fun to watch the designers whip up evening gowns in the time it takes me to make a set of placemats or a tote bag. As I once told a friend, its like watching Julia Child while you microwave a burrito.

Less appendix= more free time.

Check out my new bag:

Wondering where I got it? I'll show you:

That's right- I made that bag myself! Its my biggest sewing project to date. In the seven days since I had my appendix out, I haven't worked out at all and I've only spent a little over four hours at work. I have slept about twelve hours a day; made the above-pictured bag; read four books so far; watched countless episodes of "Top Chef" and "Lost;" and made guacamole, blueberry cobbler, peach oatmeal crumble, salads that my mother said looked straight out of a restaurant, and (my new favorite) spaghetti with bacon and eggs. Its been a busy week off.  

As many of you know, I have ADHD (Attendtion Defecit Hyperactivity Disorder). It manifests for me in a variety of ways, but one is an insatiable need to always be doing something. When I was first diagnosed, my psychiatrist was trying to determine whether I had the inattentive or hyperactive version of the disorder, so she asked me how well I tolerate sitting still. I thought about it for a minute and replied (honestly) "I don't know, I don't really sit still long enough to find out." This disorder has provided plenty of challenges for me throughout my life, but I think it also makes me well suited for manic pursuits like my work/school combo and marathon training. 

Speaking of which... I still don't know how this whole experience will impact my training. All in all, I've felt pretty good this week. I've had almost no pain, but I have dealt with exhaustion and pretty severe shortness of breath (a side-effect of anesthesia). A few days puffing on this lovely device has restored my breathing to almost normal- at least indoors. Outdoors, the heat still leaves me out of breath pretty quickly. The combo of the exhaustion and the shortness of breath means that I haven't attempted to run or go to the gym yet. There's also the fact that I still have three wounds on my stomach healing. Despite the lack of pain, I can definitely feel that I had surgery in my abdomen just a week ago and I (obviously) don't want to risk messing anything up in there. 

So, I'm taking it easy, but I am very aware of the ticking of the training clock, and even more aware that I'm registered (and paid) for a half-marathon on September 12th. As a bonus, its a half with a strict cut off time of 2:45, which means that I couldn't just decide to walk the whole thing. I think I'm going to try a brief treadmill walk at the gym tomorrow and see how it goes. I have a follow-up appointment with my surgeon on Wednesday and I hope she'll give me some solid guidance then. She was very understanding about my desire to resume training as soon as possible. 

If, for some reason, I don't make it back to training soon, I'll be happy to take orders for tote bags, and maybe even decorative pillows!